The past tense example I shared during this Sunday message was an incident from my childhood. My grandmother was babysitting me and physically punished me in front of some of her house guests because I would not say "good night" to them. Many years later, in adulthood, I had mentioned this memory to my grandmother. She had been astounded that of all the fun and loving times we had together I had "chosen" to remember that one.
For many years when I thought of the adult encounter I would think "well, of course I remember it. You hurt me. You embarrassed me. You were unloving to me." But recently those thoughts have evaporated, and I no longer choose to remember that incident with the force and focus that it held previously. It's been transformed and transmuted in my mind and in my heart.I have not forgotten it; I am controlling what weight I give it in my stack of memories and if and how often I want it to come to the top.